Anonymous asked: This may come across as creepy, but honestly, I see how you act and treat others, and you are one of the most kind hearted people I have ever seen. You are so nice, so loving, and so caring one day, you would make the best older sister I feel, along with one of the best mom's a child could ask for. :) i really admire you for that, keep being your wonderful self :)

Aww no not creepy at all! Too sweet. Thank you so much. :)

I’m going to do what makes me feel good. I don’t know why people dont do so more often. So if I want to text you, I’m going to. If you don’t want to reply, then so be it. If I want I want to call you, I’m going to. You may not answer, but if calling you just to hear it ring fills me with content, you best believe I’m going to do it. If I want to have sex, I’ll do so safely. If I don’t want to have sex, I won’t. If I want to be alone, I’ll go on drive. If I need a friend, I know who to call. When I feel sad, I will sit down and literally count all my blessing. I will tally them off, I have so many. If I have something to say, or an opinion to share, I will express my feelings in the most respectful way that I know how. If I want to drink alcohol, ill have a shot or two. If I don’t want to drink alcohol, I will not. If someone comes to me with an issue or just simply needs an open ear, I will listen with and open heart and mind as well. I don’t know what’s best for me to be completely honest, I don’t think anyone reallys does. I look back and remember how innocent I used to be. I have come so far and I don’t think I eve really give myself enough gratitude. I think my lack of confidence was my comfort zone. Feeling lousy about the way I look and the outside, and feeling uncertain about who I am on the inside has always been so familiar. The thought of it being any different frightens me to say the least. But being happy is a choice. Whether or not I take a pill every morning when I wake up. Whether I go talk about my feelings every Friday at 4 with some lady who’s intentions are good, but who doesn’t really know me. Theyre all decisions that are up to me, that may lead to what I want. ButI don’t know what I want. I have no idea, and that scares me. I dont know who I ant to be with. I dont know if I want to be with anyone. I think since forever, Ive had the perception that being happy means being in a long term relationship. And maybe that’s so, but maybe it’s not. I don’t know what I want to be when I grow up. I don’t know even know what I want to wear tomorrow, although if I could, I would wear nothing at all. Somethings I am certain of though, and here is one of them; although I haven’t a clue who this person could possibly be, I know that when I come to terms with myself, i want mor than anything for someone else to come to terms with me, too. I want someone to care for me to the core, as I would for them. I want to be able to sit in utter silence and know that tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that, that we both love each other all the same with out any words being spoken. And I want someone capable feeling as deeply as I am capable of feeling. I want someone to want to understand the person I am in the most complex way possible. I want someone to know me inside and out, so that when I’m not sure about things, I know that I have a way to turn whether it be left, right, upside down and all around. I know how real feelings can be and my willingness to share them often gets me hurt, but that’s never stopped me from trying again, and again, and again. I need to stop looking for all of this, and I need to have faith in the fact that in time everything will fall into place. But I’m going to do what makes me feel good. I don’t know why people don’t do so more often..